“I used to think I was the strangest person in the world but then I thought there are so many people in the world, there must be someone just like me who feels bizarre and flawed in the same ways I do. I would imagine her, and imagine that she must be out there thinking of me too. Well, I hope that if you are out there and read this and know that, yes, it’s true I’m here, and I’m just as strange as you.”
Beautiful, rainy April
I’m learning to talk less
An absence of voices to hear me
Is a lesson to be learned
Or so my therapist says
“
Learn to be alone
Stop looking for advice
The guidance you need is inside
”
I talk to myself
But I don’t care for the sound of my own voice
It doesn’t convince me the way it should
It doesn’t give me what I need
Yet
--------------------------------------------------------------
You obsess, stalk
Attempt to emulate creativity you do not possess
What stress continual imitation must cause
Far passed inspired,
you Suck from others' Individuality, foster a Stolen image
Stolen image after stolen image
At your best
you F a i l
In having any slight depth, voice, vision.
Do you see your luminous transparency ? Insecurity ?
Realization of your lack of identity
Leaves me vacant
So I quickly stop myself
Basic Falsities are
Undeserving
of my thoughts
of my breath
.
I smile
and Forget you